life in transit

Life has been a whirlwind since i left my lazy Arizona summer with the family, but i'm loving every minute of it. Perhaps my "happy-go-lucky" personality allows me to be more resiliant to the stresses the military delivers. All i know is that so far, i have been able to handle every challenge thrown at me. As you can see i've been back-posting a few of the emails i sent out when i couldn't access my blog. I still don't have the internet in my room here in florida, but i'm looking into getting a card for my computer through a cell phone company. I also can go to the billeting office (where i am now) but it's about a mile from my room so it will be a pain to always walk here.

I graduated!
graduation was short and sweet, with just a bit of marching, the oath, 'pass and review,' ruffles and flourishes, and the national anthem. I realize that most of you have no idea what i'm talking about, and it still makes me laugh that it all seems so natural to me now! It's amazing what you can acclamate to if given the opportunity! I will explain specifically if someone so desires. This picture is of Colonel Miller and I.


To be honest, my last week was nothing but wrapping things up, interviews with commanders, feedback, ceremonies, and briefings on what to expect at my first assignment. And last but not least..fun dinners! We had a 'dining in' in which we had to wear mess dress. Mine came back from alterations without being altered and i had to suffer with pins in my stomach all night. I had a brilliant observation at this point...i believe Air Force uniforms were designed by a gay man because the men always look great and the women look like they are quakers and are wearing a burlap sack! :) I would rather wear what the guys where than a floor-length skirt! lol..oh well..it was a ton of fun to actually get to 'get back' and our training instructors with the grog bowl...a toilet bowl full of alcoholic or non alcoholic punch..there is a huge ceremonial process ..you have to speak in rhyme and do about faces, etc...all of it was a hoot to watch. I also went to dinner with my flight and squadron commanders and learned a lot of interesting stuff. It was so surreal to have them call me by my first name and not Lt. Granroth. Creepy! :)

on the road again
Driving from Alabama to Florida was a breeze ( a mere 3 hrs) and i'm loving it here already. It's incredibly beautiful here in the panhandle (fort walton beach/destin) and there's sooooooo much to do. I'm really glad i'll be here for 11 weeks. I will take some pictures as soon as i get the chance. yesterday i explored the base and managed to get lost..it's huge! Now i know my way around, and am loving the opportunities available. I also had lunch at this amazing seafood place on the coast and watched all the sailboats out on the water while sitting outside. Bliss! it will be back to the uniforms on tuesday when i start in-processing but this little bit of freedom was fabulous. My officer quarters are actually decent..and i have my own little kitchenette..etc..like a mini-apartment.

I will have an address tomorrow, and i'll let you all know. As far as the granroth family..can you let me know if you're getting this? I have no idea what the new address is to get mail at...i didn't have internet when the whole switch occured! thanks!

catching up

the downward slide

Time is flying now.  It feels like I've been here for several months and
not several weeks, but it also is starting to go by incredibly fast.  I
had my final 'test' on Friday with the leadership reaction course, and
it went really well.  I somehow inherited the best genes from both my
mom and dad and can apparently get 's1' aka dominant and directive when
I need to be.  These challenges are really fun but really hard to
complete..there's one person who's the leader and they have to get every
one of their team members across these obstacles..poles, pillars...etc
over water with things like bombs, enemy attackers...in a matter of 20
minutes.  The leader is judged on a plethora of things but basically how
well they direct, explain and coordinate their team.  It was a ton of
fun, and at the end the commander that evaluated me said that I was the
best example of a leader he'd seen..  J  nothing like tooting my own
horn right!  Regardless...I was just glad to get it done. The o club
orientation was equally as interesting because I managed to have actual
conversations with the commanders that were screaming at us for the past
4-5 weeks!  Very weird..but nice to see that most of them are really
decent people.  I also had the opportunity to go painting at a school in
a poor neighborhood, and had a ton of fun doing that.  WE all went out
to dinner with Capt. Taylor and his wife after and he gave me some great
info about the D.C. area and where to live.  He was by far one of the
most avoided commanders the first couple weeks, but he's probably one of
the nicest and most down to earth when you actually talk to him.  The
irony amazes me. J

I can't  believe I'm going to be in Florida already this weekend.  I
think I just have to keep going with the flow at times, because when I
stop to think about it all..it's a little surreal at how different my
life has become.  It was nice talking to Karl for a few minutes, and we
could laugh about how weird it feels to be in civilian clothes at times.
I know that I've changed in a lot of ways..but most of them are subtle
and only I would probably notice.  Well...I'm going to go to write my
final 'morale' letter and go to church with a few of my flightmates so
I'll update later...love y'all

p.s.  the funniest thing is how programmed I am.  I call EVERYBODY ma'am
and sir!  I guess there are worst habits to have!

two weeks to go!

Hey Everyone~

>

>This week was by far the most challenging and tiring.  I didn't have a

>single second to do anything except exactly what I was supposed to be

>doing.  I managed to get 2-4 hours of sleep each night and finally

>crashed this morning after mandatory breakfast.  J  Man that felt good!

>However, despite the exhaustion I had a good week and I'm in a pretty

>darn good mood!  This week we finally got all of our uniforms squared

>away and no longer have to wear the pathetic nametags they had given us.

>We also wore our blues for the first time, and my foot is feeling

>better!  I had to give a briefing on Thursday and I was incredibly

>nervous but it went really well (my commander used me as an example

>during our debriefing).  We also did a leadership challenge where they

>dumped us in this field and gave us a compass and clues and we had to

>find our way through these challenges.  It was actually a ton of fun,

>and I discovered ordering people around comes pretty easy for me.

>Lol...J 

>

>In other good news, we've been having TONS of informative lectures on

>top of our war, history,  and leadership classes, and one of our briefs

>was from an Air Force JAG (air force judge advocate) on my favorite

>topic:  fraternization!  I ended up going  to talk to him after the

>lecture and he was really great.  He told me that because my

>relationship was prior that I wouldn't be punished as harshly under the

>UCMJ (basically you are dismissed from the military (dishonorably)

>forced to give back all your pay, and put in prison- however these are

>for officers sleeping around for the most part).  He informed me that I

>SHOULD decide if I want to be with Rich but said that if I indeed want

>to stay with him, to not force myself to get married in the next couple

>weeks.  He suggested I plan a wedding which my family could attend..even

>in the summer and said that he didn't know many commanders that would

>punish me based on my situation.  It made me feel a whole lot better

>about it all.  Sooo basically I don't have to decide TODAY what I'm

>going to do.  I can just keep it on the D-L and decide as we go on.   We

>are also in 2nd class now, which means we can actually leave the base

>and wear civilian clothes while we're gone!  J I saw a bunch of people

>leave last night, and I had to laugh because it looked incredibly weird

>to see people wearing jeans and t-shirts..anything besides our uniforms!

>WE also no longer have tight meals: which means we can actually talk

>quietly.  It's amazing how quick you can eat when you aren't allowed (we

>eat in about 5 minutes usually)...but now our lunch dp's are dragging

>out.  J 

>

>Life isn't all fun and games though:  this Monday we have our final exam

>(HUGE ONE) that basically determines if we pass COT, and it has a

>ridiculous amount of information on it.  I do believe I will be cramming

>the next couple of hours before I finally take my hair out of it's

>permanent bun and put on some jeans to go to dinner!  Yay!  J  Next week

>we are also going to AEF, which means we will be "deploying" to a

>location where we live in a tent city for three days, eat MRE's, rappel,

>do high ropes courses, play war games, and do triage war healthcare.  I

>think it actually sounds like a ton of fun (minus the black-widow,

>snake, lectures..etc).  

>

>Now that I've slept: life is actually pretty decent.  I was getting a

>little down the other day, but I seriously am lucky to have the flight I

>have because they're all great people. 

>

>

>

>Well...I guess I should get to studying and doing something productive

>so I can actually enjoy my freedom tonight.  Love you all....

>

>I will send pictures soon..I just haven't had a chance. 

G.I. Barbie

G.I. Barbie
>
> Yup that's my call name. J I had to laugh when the guys first 
> christened me with it..but it's all in good fun. I guess it's a 
> compliment because apparently I am "cute" but way to hardcore to be 
> called regular Barbie. Lol..anyways..I lived in a tent city for the 
> past 3 days and it was actually really really fun. We treated it like 
> a TDY but more like a deployment than anything. I have to say that 
> being a tom-boy growing up and camping out all the time was great 
> preparation for all of this. None of it bothered me all that much. We 
> ate MRE's and I realized I have officially acclimated to the military 
> as I managed to actually enjoy a few of the MRE's I was given! I also 
> decided that they would make great Christmas presents for all of my 
> loved ones, so don't worry you'll all get your chance to enjoy. J It 
> was kind of fun to have all of the Alpha girls in one tent and I got 
> way more than four hours of sleep..(ironic that the best sleep we get 
> is in a tent). I was out cold and didn't even hear the planes taking 
> off every 15 minutes the first night...(wasn't so lucky the second
night).
>
> They took pity on us officers at dinner time though and provided us 
> with hot meals..which we thoroughly enjoyed. The whole event was 
> probably the most fun I've had the whole time here...we're done with
all
> of our official testing (both academic and athletic) and we were free 
> to kind of hang out a bit. WE also had a huge mass casualty and I was 
> one of the two triage nurses..what a thrill! It was actually 
> incredibly realistic and we all played it out like it was the real 
> deal. WE had an ER, OR, ICU, medsurg, pharmacy, etc...complete with 
> chains of command, bombs going off, security running around with 
> guns....etc etc etc. It was sooooooo much fun, and I realized how much
I
> like things fast paced and in your face. It was also a great 
> experience in triage, quick vital assessments, and reporting off to 
> the docs. In addition to the medical drills, we also did four person 
> carries on stretchers and I managed to be on the team with the 200 # 
> patient and the pathetic lifting partners..lets just say my triceps 
> don't like me very much today. Lastly, we did "confidence" and high 
> ropes courses. I love stuff like this and had a blast, but I do have 
> to say that my physical strength and trust was tested to the limit on 
> a few. Rapelling, and balancing on a log fifty feet in the air was a 
> definite thrill and a test of mind over matter. I am bruised from head

> to toe and feel like I was ran over by a truck but I had such a great 
> time. And drumroll please....i have a bit of free time before 
> dinner...AMAZING! The rest of this week is more leadership/physical 
> challenges and then all fun stuff. We have the "o" club orientation 
> (officers club) a 5k run on Saturday and we're painting a Montgomery 
> elementary school for a charity project. Next week is graduation week,

> so it's a wrap up of everything we've learned and a loosening of the 
> chain. I no longer feel like a poser in my uniforms and everything 
> just kind of comes naturally.
>
> I am really excited about my career and everything I'm getting 
> into...sooooo much cool stuff to look forward to! I have a ton of 
> pictures too..but it'll be a bit before I can get around to that....i 
> need to figure out my travel plans to florida in my free time. Love
y'all
>

Reflections on a sunday

> Reflections on a Sunday.
> 
> Where do we  get strength?  
> 
> I'm not even sure how to put all of my racing thoughts
> into coherent
> form, but I think it's therapeutic  to even try.  This
> whole experience
> has caused a lot of soul-searching, and self-assessment.  I
> thought I
> knew myself pretty well, that I was independent, strong,
> put together
> and completely sure of myself.  And though some of this
> still rings
> true, I'm daily discovering things about myself that
> cause me to step
> back and analyze (Kaye I think you would appreciate this). 
>  The whole
> realization  that I may have to choose between a career and
> love has put
> an incredible amount of pressure on Rich and I to CHOOSE
> and to make a
> DECISION that ultimately we may not even be qualified to
> choose.  I
> think sometimes I don't put enough faith in a power
> higher than myself.
> Though I tell myself I do, I don't think I really allow
> myself to leave
> it up to him.  
> 
> Today I went to "church" with two of the women
> from my flight.  To be
> honest we just watched her church service online, and
> listened to some
> uplifting music and talked about faith in general.  It was
> exactly what
> I needed.  I think in the military if you don't have
> some kind of belief
> that there is something bigger than us, than what we're
> doing, you'll
> never be able to truly deal with it all.  It was so
> refreshing and
> uplifting to sit and talk about really deep things without
> the
> boundaries of denominations and rules.  We all grew up a
> different way,
> with different expectations and rituals yet it doesn't
> matter when it
> all comes down to it.  It feels good to kind of just let it
> all go.  I
> think I've been feeling a bit jaded with religion
> lately.  I don't know
> if that's quite the right word but I guess I didn't
> feel like I even
> really needed to go.  I still believe the core of what I
> believed as a
> child, but I honestly don't feel as if the message that
> the ministers
> would preach on Sundays were reaching me or having any
> effect on me at
> all.  Faith should be about a relationship that you have
> with yourself
> and GOD.  Period, end of sentence.   I guess the reason
> that I've been
> thinking about this all so much is that when you're in
> a situation in
> which everything is new and overwhelming and you have no
> control..there's still that one thing that you always
> have with you.
> I'm having difficulty writing this as eloquently and
> clearly as it is in
> my mind, but I guess I'm just trying to attempt to this
> newfound
> feeling.    
> 
> Meant to be?
> 
> I'm a huge believer in that things happen for a reason,
> so is it so far
> fetched as to say that I was meant to do this?  REally...if
> you think
> about it..many of you were shocked when I said that I
> planned on joining
> the military.  Even I surprised myself a bit.  I know that
> I had always
> had a small inkling about it, but I honestly expected
> myself to go off
> to some prestigious hospital and go on with life.  This
> opportunity just
> kind of fell in my lap and to be honest, it appears to be
> everything I
> had hoped it would.  If I'm saying this in training
> (which blows)  I am
> confident that I ill love the actual operational Air Force!
>  Lol J  I
> feel as if a part of me is being fulfilled that I
> didn't realize needed
> to be.  I feel strangely at peace with everything and
> don't feel as if
> I'm trying to prove myself as much or searching for
> "something else."  A
> lot of this is subconscious and I think In a way I'm
> finding a part of
> myself that I didn't realize was missing.
> 
> Now before you all think I've gone off the deep
> end...keep in mind I've
> had a lot of time to think lately!  I've also had a lot
> of great
> listeners, and people with incredible life experiences for
> advice and
> stories.  I am the baby here in my flight (there's only
> two of us that
> just graduated from college) and the majority of my
> flightmates are in
> their 30's and 40's.  They are an incredible group
> of people.  
> 
> One more thing
> 
> I think the most reassuring thing to me today was the
> incredible peace
> that I got when I thought about my relationship with Rich. 
> For the past
> couple of days I've been questioning everything about
> our lives in the
> desperate hope that I could somehow predict if we could
> make it.  Today
> I just stopped.  I feel incredibly at ease with the
> possibility of
> spending the rest of my life with him if the situation does
> arise, and
> know that with faith, love and family we could survive
> anything.  
> 
>  
> 
> So...to sum up this cluster-fuck (pardon my French) of a
> message, I am
> feeling great..i have an incredible support system in you
> all, and in my
> flightmate here, and I am happy.  Plus I got to sleep in
> today.  Lol!